Have you noticed yourself boiling up when a colleague says something you don’t like or if you accidentally spill your coffee? Are you constantly “flying off the handle” for simple things? Does your friends or family complain that you get enraged too easily? If so, you probably have anger management issues. While anger is a normal and human emotion, when it gets out of control, it can become destructive.

This overwhelming rage can then translate into negative behavior and actions that are violent. How does one stop this? How can you prevent yourself from falling into such a violent rage of anger? How can you manage your anger? One of the early ways of managing anger is identifying it, so let's look at what anger is all about.

Anger is simply an emotional state of mind that varies in intensity from simple annoyance at your co-worker to intense fury and rage maybe when you feel disrespected. It is relatively easy to manage when we first notice that first irritation, but when it builds or intensifies, it is generally more challenging to manage.

Such uncontrolled anger can cause employees to have major problems at work and in their personal relationships. It can also lead to:

• guilt

• low self-esteem

• the use drugs and alcohol to manage feelings

• anxiety

• Psychosomatic illness.

Unhealthy anger management practices

Some anger management practices are unhealthy. Some of these are misdirected and displaced anger, suppressing anger and using substances to manage anger. These practices are not effective, and eventually, the 'anger' will resurface again.

Best ways to manage your anger

1. Be aware of your words and behavior

It will help if you acknowledge that some days can be bad. Instead of expressing your anger in an explosive way or with indecent language, use calm words and describe how you feel to your co-workers. When a co-worker is challenging to work with, communicate your frustrations with that persons or someone else who can help. Be as calm and clear as you can so no one feels attacked.

2. Find the origin

Always take time daily to identify what might be the root of all the anger you feel at work or home. It is always good to understand the source of the frustration. You can use meditation, exercising, etc., to clear your mind, consider past trauma and identify the cause of all the problems.

3. Delay team discussion until you are calmer

If you are really upset and know you are not thinking rationally and clearly, then ask to postpone a meeting or event that will cause you to bluster out or react in a way that could compromise your professionalism. Remember words said cannot be taken back, even if you apologize.  If the meeting is not for a few hours, you can take a walk, vent with a friend or do some deep breathing to calm down.  

4.  Make an effort to reduce stress

Do your best to minimize stress in your life by exercising, finding solutions to problems, and finding ways to relax. Stress can be a trigger as often when people are overwhelmed, they tend to lash out at others for the slightest bit of provocation.

5. Develop healthy habits.

Unhealthy habits such as overworking, being around toxic people, overuse of alcohol or drugs, and stress can make you more susceptible to anger. So one way of managing your anger at work is by managing your emotional and mental health by finding suable coping strategies for things that irritate you like not taking things personally, journaling, EFT tapping, listening to music, etc.

Last tip

It is important that you know what triggers you and avoid those things or learn to manage the situation around them. If after trying on your own you are not able to help yourself, then seek professional help.